[Tuesday, March 18, 2008]
I got time therefore i input the lyrics on the song on the blogpost like i used to do. Maybe i will go hiatus. Life got back to status quo. Motivation proves to be oneself to acclaimed. Patience is yet for human nature to fully incorporate with life. Adaptation :-[
MANdai
UNITED] claims that Patience is virtue & that Life will be more meaningful then. Prove yet to sustained the claims..
Our Hopes & Expectations..
Black Holes & Revelations..
When things doesn't go the way like we expected. Break away before life's got tattered. As rhymes as this blog may seem, for broken hearts of a shattered dreams.
Emotions Buried Alive. 9:55pm (GMT+8)
- erMan -
9:37:00 PM;
[Sunday, March 16, 2008]
For now.. I actually quite tired. tired of everything for anything. For the first time.. i really dun feel like doing anything but sleep my way thru days. Work hasnt been that really great as how it meant to be. People hasnt been really great either. I didnt regret to leave Nike but i regret to choose a job hastily. For now im sure wher i'm going now. it seem so messed-up & confused now.
On personal life, things are not going any better for now. every years it been like this so i'm kind of like so used to all this. so used to disappointment. At times i wonder how much people care for our feelings. Are they being selfish enuf to only think bout themself. At times, their words doesnt resounds their actions. In a way its kind of sad to encounter such people. living in disappointment lasted since in primary school days when living without a mother is extremely tough. Care & feelings doesnt always last long. They pass by, pity u & left. that's what has always been. To a certain point of time, i hav always thought i found the love of my life. everytime other time, i always give a chance for relationship because we never know wher we can go unless we try. At times, people dun understand me, never wanted to understand me of wat i am. As if i asked to be born like this. i also understand that i cant change to wat they want & i wudnt want them to change to what i want. its the matter of how i adapt to it & how the other party adapt to it. i want to run.. far far away from everyone because no one ever knew wats runnning in the heart & mind of mine. No one ever cared.
This is just an expression moment of mine as i aint got no one to turn to. No one. People just pretend to be there.
To those who had killed & shattered my hopes, my dreams, my expectations, if u know how hard my heart cried taking in all these while, there still some human in u.
- eRman -
4:35:00 PM;
[Sunday, March 9, 2008]
woke up late afternoon after another helluva nite out with the usual peps.. w/o Fad thou..we when for a prata session, ordering the unusual prata that we may find ther at the Prata Place. well i actualli mistook a sugar bottle for a mayonaise bottle,dumb2 me. Sadiq,Fit & yana was ther wif me for the prata session. shortly after our prata time, we head to B.batok coz yana left her bag with her fren & the bag contains their home keys. Mama called her asking her when is she reachin home & literally she got stressed thinking bout it. Haha. And so we sent dem home while i & sadiq realli chills out till cant chill no more,waiting for Mama to sleep = Coz Fit wanna join us out still. We heads off to West Coast Park. My 2nd time ther. haha. we sit around by the breaker giving brain-teaser & corny guessing games. almost to the end of it, got bombarded by them bout watelse.. bout Fad. coz i guess i kept talking bout how is she in HkG, Hkg tis & Hkg dat till they keep on teasing me if i haf fallen for Fad. Dear diary.. i cant disclose much! haha. sometimes, things are better left unsaid, it might do us good.. all i can say i do like having Fad around. more than that, is for me to think & decides.. wat i worried most is shud speculation of ppl got wrong, Fad wud get a wrong impression & we might not be close friends anymore.. time shall proves itself as all things on mind unfold.. i shall stop here now.
- eRman -
6:42:00 PM;
[Friday, March 7, 2008]
hey.. i hope the lappy wunt died on me. lil' batt power left. i'll just make a quick update. started werkin alredi. so farr... so goodies.. haha. anothing thing, life been going well but not dat well so much during this few days.. reason being my other half went to HOng Kong.. to tell the whole load story, i cant but i hope i will update about it slowly. aniwae Fad went Hkg.. so gotta wait for her return to continue our fun,hilarious journey. Haha!! gotta stop for now. bat goin to end. shucks! taking care! Fadillah,the song! :P
- eRman -
10:07:00 PM;
[Saturday, March 1, 2008]
I'm currently on a holiday.. & it does makes me go crazy having nuthin to do,sleepless at night etc.. I haf not been able to sleep well or not sleeping at all at night, due to the holiday dat i'm in. My body mechanism seems to adapting to a different timezone. I haf been stayin home pretty much to conserve my "resources" - dat's applied chimpnology *grins* Went over to take a peek or wassup over in CinE outlet on thursday,basically dey are hoorayin since "the reaper" no longer resides ther. Ahakz. next destination is my roots for sure. Vivocity.well it does held alot of memories ther & i can see that i'm getting down a bit emo as i go on, beware to get bored ppl. Its sad to leave thou but as we move on to a certain point, somehow we gotta leave the past to seek the future. but dat doesnt mean i wud forget the staff dat i hav been slogging hard with all-along. i do hope i will remember dem & meet dem when time permits. To be honest, i thinks i got a problem in handling people. maybe my interpersonal skills is yet to be so-called full-pledge. I can feel that i'm being regimental without showing compassionate to those under my wing before. but i really detest lazy bums. its unfair at times if u know how to analyse things..
Aniwae,moving forward, i haf always wished that it will be a better enviroment on the next job, wher people work in a postive attitude.*crossing fingers* SEE, i got carried away from my initial topic. ouhk,went over vivo to collect all my last belongings & stuffs dat i received from NIKE SINGAPORE. Meet up with Bridgette,Salinah & Arif for an impromtu meeting over the gathering that will be held on sunday.Yesterday, i met up with the Crapzie's.. Far East be the meeting place & watch the LEAP years at tiong bahru plaza. i shud say i enjoyed the movie. althou it looks just like another drama which u may find in the tv, still the messages conveyed make us repeats certain taglines of the movies, making us remember wats the story about. Love story.. sweet as it can be. i dunno if the rest of the crews like the movies but definitely it not a loss for me to choose watching leap years den the Spartans movie. an utterly rubbish movie. not exactly that i dun appreciate that kind of movies, just that its more meaningful & worthwhile watchin leap years. reviews from the movie that i've watched, its actually true. dat u shud at least listen,give opportunity to the other half to speak out..
Philosopher i am not, but i do believe that expressing/pouring out what's inside is always a gud thing to do.. dun leave everything to fate but u decides it all, most of it. Sometimes, ppl tends to be loud,blunt,oblivious to nature.. my qns is, to wat extends. At times it makes me got lost in direction/translation when interacting with this certain community of ppl. its always a gud thing for dem to be happy, humourous juz dat wher it ends? when r dey serious about stuff? it makes me believe that those ppl are also confused with their own things on-hand. dey dun seems to know wat they realli want, how r dey going to achieve to that? at times, dey do take things for granted. not knowin wher to stop when dey shud. who shud be blame? God knows..
the world is not real - quoted by the intellectual ones. to a certain aspect, some is unreal, some is real, a balance to everything; namely yin & yang. shud its really not real.. mayb feelings are not real either. A person moves the other by a smile,frown,laughter or sad,all those sorts of expression so was it real,sincerely from deep within? ouk since i'm way off track, gotta get back on it. we went on to "Durian session" at Geylang Lor. 17 *mind you wher u thinking at* unfortunately, i just dun haf the feel of eating durians. just dun feel like my mouth eager for it. aniwae, it drags on till 1am when we decides to haf a take-away & consumed it at east coast. its a real nite out but its fine for me since i seem to be adopting insomnia. reached home close to 6am & as usual, the tossing game on the bed doesnt decides my fate. since i cant sleep, i went on for a run in the cool morning. from my place all the way to Sembawang Park, going realli slow to enjoy the early morning mood. greetings to fellow morning joggers,theirs smiles around, i find that singaporean to haf graciousness even to the last bit of it. lives hards struggling in singapore, but y we cant just migrate from my views, is the people that we have living around in singapore to make it complete. bought breakfast from the family at home who's enjoying the cool morning on 1st March. NOw it goes down to wher i am now, right here typing out every single bit of reminiscene. its close to 11.30am now. mayb i will take a nap nw. gud dae to all readers.
sidenote:Constance, ABC *smile*
im dozing off soon. gudnite evangelion. *hugs*
- eRman -
10:35:00 AM;
